The managers of a Lincoln theater say Fleetwood Mac guitarist Lindsey Buckingham’s “diva-like behavior” doomed his concert there this week, and “I have heart trouble. Help me,” Parker said. “I’m sorry, ma’am,” the gunman replied. “I have heart trouble,” Parker told him. “Ma’am, it’s going to be all right,” the gunman said. “I’m probably going to have a heart attack,” Parker said. “Oh my, ma’am, please do not have a heart attack. Please do not have a heart attack. Please don’t, ma’am,” he said. The gunman let Parker call 911, and when the store phone didn’t work, he let her get her cell phone. She told the operator she was having a heart attack, but didn’t mention the robber. “Rococo staff and management were put off by his diva-like behavior … and wondered if he always felt it necessary to be so rude to people who are simply trying to put on a good show,” A customer came in and, without seeing the gunman, tried to calm Parker. She posed for pictures with little girls while the gunman secured a doll with a Western cowboy hat and get-up, handed him the phone, and he spoke to the 911 operator. The gunman then reappeared and told the man to get into the beverage cooler. The result is at once dour and hilarious, like a playground designed by a Welsh miner. It might also be considered a feminist response to the De Maria “Earth Room” that is generously available for a little climbing. He then grabbed his loot and apologized again. “You have a good day. I’m sorry this had to happen. I’m sorry. God!” he moaned. He then went out the door. Ticket holders will receive refunds.

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