This morning I lost a novel. The morning before that I needed to visualise a tunnel of air, a wind tunnel linking my throat through my insides and down. The morning before that, I could see my breath while walking. The night before, I sent her a message saying I was sorry for everything I said. The next day I was back to normal. That night I went through the land of Egypt, sending death on every first male child, of man and of beast, and judging all the gods of Egypt. In the morning I looked out and saw this beautiful colored rainbow. Days later i started bleeding i had clots. The next morning I took a bus out to the Four Points of Heaven Mall. We passed the auto shop along the way. The garage was strewn with flowers. One night I ran out of formula for my son, I couldn’t wait until the next day so I took him with me to the store, it came up to 15 dollars. That morning I dreaded facing my parents, by evening I wasn’t sure if they were even alive. the day after that I managed to get him to speak to me on the phone because I needed to know what was happening. the day after that, I went to his Funeral. That, by far, is the hardest thing I have done in my 15 years I have been alive. Every night I ask the stars up above, why must I be a teenager in love?

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