Silence invades the dark lecture hall; and an old and wise theosophist lits a candle, stands up and says: My friends the question you raised is of great importance. As there was arguing between theosophists before, I will reply your questions with some quotes, which I am sure, will give you enough food for thought:”After that, there was no way he wanted to come out alive,” she said. “The police told me he shot himself. They said they shot him in the chest and then he shot himself in the throat.” Still, she was angry that police never gave her a chance to talk to him. “I think if they had let me talk to him, he might have had a chance,” she said. Friends described Preston as a man with wealth, good looks and a volatile personality. They said he had great charm and a way with women. But he was also a heavy drinker, they said, and was fascinated by guns, which he collected. Acquaintances also said he was experiencing psychological difficulties. As Wardle answered questions after the lecture he said, “Our future has to lie beyond the bounds of this planet. We have to reach for something that will explain away all of the BULLSHIT, and then it will be alright again. He stood behind a tree and watched for a while, then he went back to his hotel. He had no idea of what he was going to do. What did you do? I asked. The next day I made some phone calls. My first call was of course to my neighbor, who assured me she’d be happy to keep Antoinette. That taken care of, I called the tour company to assure them I was all right but wouldn’t be continuing on their trip. Then I called my bank to transfer my funds. Then I went to Kansas City. They had a place called the Potato Ballroom, and, on a holiday, every holiday, they had a ceremony in which they destroyed the sand mandala they created from the fragments of an egg laid by a diving duck on the knee of Ilmatar, goddess of the air. More than 60 people attended the ceremony, silently watching as the intricate design of millions of grains of colored sand was swept up and then poured into a nearby creek. I watched the news all night. I now knew that this was real, but it didn’t seem real. There was no news about another US soldier who died yesterday by being shot by a weapon that discharged while being cleaned.

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